Thursday, October 23, 2008

Get The Party Started

Update: Early voting rocks. I was in and out (dirty) in 10 minutes.
In Colorado, today is Election Day. So is tomorrow and every day until Halloween. Local media reports a larger percentage of those identified as Democrats then Republicans have cast ballots so far in early voting, which began Monday. Red may turn blue this year.

Completed my sample ballot last night and it’s a long one. The big man was a quick and easy bubble, but the Referendums and Amendments ad nauseam required study of a scholarly nature. I became one with the little blue “2008 State Ballot Information Booklet” for two straight, sober hours (however, there’s something hip and naughty about deciding history while in both pajamas and bed). I’m an educated, good with words woman, but found myself reading for and against arguments over and over, drilling down to the true meaning. All good marketing whores know how to spin copy; when others do it the alarms go off in my head like kitchen smoke alarm versus greasy broiler pan. It’s maddening how often the word “could” is used.

“The Referendum COULD affect state and local tax”
“The Addendum COULD fund future prairie dog and puppy killing”

How do the moderately stupid people get through it, the ones who use “your” incorrectly and spell it “suprise”?
SuRprisingly, I found myself voting against nearly every ballot issue, mostly due to limited definitions and muddy repercussions. The state needs funding for highway improvement, but is diverting severance tax revenue from water projects the way to get her done? Why bestow 80% of new taxes generated from extended casino hours and increased single bet limits in mountain gambling towns solely to community colleges (the fancy term for 13th Grade)? I rolled eyes at the Amendment to allow the state to hold business executives criminally accountable should they knowingly participate in fraudulent practices. The Feds got that covered, but out here in the West we likes to hang ‘em twice.

Most troubling is Amendment 48, which would define “person” as “any human being from the moment of fertilization.” Since LifeStyles® stop a potential person from swimming up and latching onto my innards, I could be guilty of manslaughter on a good weekend.

Sometimes two or three times a night.

2 comments:

/brandon\ said...

it is never any fair when they can tie an issue to the killing of puppies.

Miz UV said...

Har!

I made at least one mistake on mine by not waiting for more info cuz we wanted to get it over with and mail 'em. Oh well.

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