Meyers Briggs tells me mine is an ENFP personality and, surprising to some, extroverts aren’t (by this definition) the most social of all butterflies at a cocktail party. Rather extroverts derive energy from and recharge in the presence of others. I'm not full, not even close it feels.
ENFPs have a strong need to be liked. Some have real difficulty being alone, especially on a regular basis.
I feel like crap and have for some time now. I don’t care for it.
Yes, I believe in the balance of happy-and-sad, ying-and-yang, chocolate-and-peanut butter. But could I just feel better already? Inspired? Ready to straddle the planet and shout yea-haw? All I want to do is drink dirty martinis and chew on the olives while supine on the couch, wearing a tank top instead of a bra and pants that pull on, no snaps or zipper.
Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. Basically happy people, they may become unhappy when they are confined to strict schedules or mundane tasks.
Took a solid week away from the day job and spent it making plans. Plans plans plans plans plans. Kept up a strong pace of activities so the worries and lonely and feeling left out of what everyone else seemed to be doing, to be having wouldn’t catch me. And I had some marvelous times. Wandered the Denver Zoo in the morning, munched a patty melt and real chips in the afternoon at an Irish Pub. Drank beer when I wanted. Meet up with old girlfriends, Easter dinner, took myself to movies and a show. Finally signed up for the first of many graphic design classes.
And then I made more plans. So many that plans have overlapped plans. So many that if I don’t plan to make it to 5:30 spinning tonight, no other classes fit until Sunday.
ENFP's see meaning in everything and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves.
Haven’t seen the manfriend much and that gets me uncomfortably sad and angry because what started out as something casual turned into something regular, then headed into something good. Now something maybe dissolving too easily.
Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, ENFPs may become bored with what actually is. Less mature ENFPs may need to feel they are the center of attention all the time.
A deeply insightful friend (the kind that really listens when you talk) and I chewed over drinks and amazing bread we dunked often and much into olive oil and heavenly grated cheese. She told me mine is a life with the luxury to ponder, to be still and think and absorb. Both a blessing and a curse, she said, because such reflection can lead to a constant hum of dialogue in ones own head. And yes, I agreed, I'm sometimes felled by not knowing which way to go and simply fill the quiet with noise instead. Or sit down in the middle of it all, disengage and tell myself it doesn't matter anyway, hey hey hey.
ENFPs live in the world of possibilities and can become very passionate and excited about things. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.
It matters. Goodness it does, so fill me up.