Friday, April 30, 2010

He's Just Not That Into You?

Sheryl Crow must be pissed.

It was widely reported after her romantic split with Lance Armstrong (and confirmed by both) that the relationship (and their engagement) ended mostly because Lance didn’t want any more kids, his deal-breaker. Plus right after they broke up he went and gave her the cancer.*

This morning Lance tweeted news of a second child with girlfriend Anna Hansen just 10 months after the birth of their son. For those keeping score that's two sperminations post Crow. At the time of the first girlfriend pregnancy Lance confirmed despite going through rough treatment for advanced testicular cancer it was a “natural” baby, his first in that fashion; three kids with the ex-wife whisked up in test tubes from frozen dealies taken beforehand. So I'm guessing protection wasn't much of an issue, the first baby a suprise in the truest sense, testament to the power of his sperm and cosmic giggle of nature and biology.

And now super ball has gone and done it again.

Talk about getting the one fuzzy end of the lollipop.

*A joke. One-toe-over-the-line humor not intended to offend. Besides you can’t “catch" cancer. It has to be whammied on you.**

**I apologize most sincerely for the apology. Y'all come back now!

5 comments:

justsomethoughts... said...

well, she didnt write "my favorite mistake" about lance, did she...

The mad woman behind the blog said...

Okay, I thought it would take more than dating Sheryl Crow to kill my love of the Uniball.
He just be dead to me now. Sorry Lance, you're just not the man I thought you were.

LOVE how you told this, btw!

Don said...

With a name like Lance Armstrong, his sperm has to be all-conquering, doesn't it.

Peau said...

all things aside, Sheryl Crow is aging spectacularly. Lance is not.

Syd said...

Hahahah. Seriously. Ha.

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